Orgasms, Orgasms and More Orgasms
As humans we’re capable of many different types of orgasms- 23 kinds in fact!
We often limit ourselves to the idea of just one- peak orgasms, therefore missing out on the many other possibilities that the orgasm offers. Sometimes thinking we’re not even having one when we actually are…
Orgasms come in many shapes and sizes and all of them are valuable- even the little half, almost, ones shouldn’t be dismissed. Why? Well, from little things big things grow!
Orgasms and the search for them (when not under pressure) can bring in some playful and beautiful moments of sexual intimacy too.
So what types of orgasms are there?
As mentioned the most common idea of orgasm is that of peak orgasm: the sudden discharge of accumulated sexual excitement, resulting in rhythmic muscular contractions in the pelvic region characterized by sexual pleasure, often associated with other 
involuntary actions, including muscular spasms in multiple areas of the body, general euphoric sensation and, frequently, body movements and vocalizations (this is the Oh God, I’m coming moment). In a man, orgasm is generally accompanied by ejaculation, or release of his semen. The period after this orgasm (known as the refractory period) is often a relaxing experience, attributed to the release of oxytocin, prolactin and endorphins.
Other types of orgasm:
Orgasms can be bone shaking and spine tingling; they can also be so subtle that we don’t even realise they’ve happened…even a pleasurable shiver is a kind of body orgasm. Orgasms are generally accompanied by pleasurable sensations of heat and/or tinglings (what we call orgasmic energy), tension, fullness and release but they can also be accompanied by others such as expansion, opening, bliss, freedom- where our ordinary minds switch off and we feel the freedom of being mindless- what is known as the ‘little death of the ego’. We generally feel a change in our physical state after orgasm, we feel relaxed, expanded, lighter, more open or somehow different.
- Genital focussed- where the sensations of heat, tingling etc are experienced only around the genitals, generally peak style.
- Full body orgasm- where the sensations are experienced in many or most areas of the body. Sensations can be more fluid.
- Ejaculatory- the orgasmic energy is accompanied by the pleasurable release of semen, or female ejaculate called Amrita.
- Non ejaculatory- orgasmic energy peaks without fluid release (for men too).
- Explosive- where the pleasure seems to explode out of your body.
- Implosive- where the pleasure expands through your body, can feel like pleasure or melting/opening sensations.
- Multiple Orgasms– several ongoing peaks and releases of orgasmic energy, generally without fluid release every time.
- Spot Orgasms- P spot for men (either external or internal); Clitoral, G, P, A, C, U and Cervix for women. Clitoral orgasms are usually limited, others can be multiple, particularly the P and G spots.
- PC Orgasm- yes, contracting your pelvic floor muscles and breathing fully can actually take you into an orgasm.
- Valley Orgasm- this is where it can seem like nothing is happening but if you allow yourself to drop into it (in those moments of stillness during lovemaking that we so hope you’re having) where surrender happens and you open into something else, hard to define, it can be filled with connection, love, peace, expansion and more. You know it’s happening as your state has changed, worth exploring.
- Solo Orgasm- the ones you have by yourself can be truly delicious if you take your time.
- Anal Orgasm- your anus has a large range of nerve endings that can be awakened to pleasure.
- Non genital orgasm- arousal and peak/release of orgasmic energy can be experienced anywhere in the body- not only nipples but given time and consistent tantric stroking virtually any area of the body can become orgasmic.
- Breathgasms- through breathing alone.
- Mindgasms- where your fantasy takes you all the way.
- Spontaneous Orgasm- can happen anywhere at anytime eg. during exercise, if you’re energy sensitive or just lucky.
- Chakra Orgasm- energy expansion and release in a chakra ie. the heart or third eye (can be visual).
- Transcending orgasm- where the orgasmic energy expands up your spine.
- Emotional Orgasm- the pleasure that can arise after a release of emotion in lovemaking.
- Soul Orgasm- may not be associated with physical pleasure but contains images or senses that relate to us personally eg. feeling reborn or having a glimpse of infinity. Afterwards you feel a profound shift in the state of your body.
- Spiritual Orgasms- a sense of being at one with everything.
- Firebreath Orgasm- this is one we teach at our workshops and is a combination of many of the above!
- Anorgasm- no orgasm, or at least orgasm as we traditionally think of it. This occurs in 1 in 3 women during sexual play and up to 2/3 of women during penetration. It is rare, (or rarely reported as a problem) in men.
How do we experience more orgasms?
The main skill in experiencing more varieties of orgasms is in understanding what is possible, having an open mind and being willing to hang around in lovemaking long enough to experience it. Men are generally more single genital orgasm focussed but this is by no means what they are limited to.
The next step is to explore:
Stroking new areas of your body with your full presence, for touch helps to awaken your sensations, and your presence helps you (and your lover) to experience them.
Playing with your breath as breathing is the driver of your pleasure, (especially as you get close to orgasm and as you go into it. Most people stop breathing here not knowing they’re depriving themselves of greater pleasure!).
Keeping your body relaxed rather than tense as energy flows through relaxed muscles!
Keeping your attention inside your body as this is where orgasms happen.
Make friends with your pelvic floor as its contractions are literally a sexual energy pump!
Try some different positions.
Using your imagination (for where the mind goes the energy follows)
Letting go of trying too hard to get there, tensing up and overriding your pleasure.
Make orgasm a pleasurable journey of exploration rather than merely a goal to achieve.
3. The same thing happens to our genitals- they become armoured because of sexual wounding. And sexual wounding isn’t limited to sexual abuse… sexual wounding can happen simply through “doing” or having “unfeeling” sex. The current pornographic model of sex, sadly our most common teacher, is focussed on the “doing”, and on what sex looks like because porn is a visual medium. Rather than focussing on what it might actually feel like which is what we are actually interested in. Over time this hard and fast porn style thrusting by under prepared genitals just creates sexual numbness.
Sexual Energy is the primal and creative energy of the universe. Everything that is alive has been created by it, animals, plants, humans, even the universe itself by the first big bang, according to Tantric mythology. Even though most of us may cringe at the idea of our parents having sex, this is how we were made too. In fact whilst visiting the fabulous and fun Sex Museum in Amsterdam (highly recommended if you’re in the area) the only thing that bothered Annette were the pornographic images (quite innocent these days) of people with hairdo’s like her mum and dad!
It is in inspiration for new ideas, it is the energy we feel when we’ve had an uplifting shift in our self awareness. You’ve probably felt it yourself after really satisfying sex, finding yourself with increased enthusiasm and vitality for living. Sexual energy opens us and makes us available for life.
Saying Yes to our Sexual Energy
connect with something larger than ourselves. Almost every community on earth with some kind of ritual or spiritual practice seeking to access something to call God or Spirit. Even science focuses on it with its desire to explain the unexplainable.
to acting out the suppression and repression of this energy rather than by its healthy expression. Even many psychological problems could be said to be based in the repression of this powerful force.
sex there is union of the physical body, the subtle and soul bodies. This happens whether we are aware of it or not, whether we believe in such things or not.
As a man, your real sexual orgasmic pleasure begins at your current “10”.
A simple process to try during lovemaking, or self pleasuring, is when you start to get close to your point of no return, is to simply stop and take 3 – 4 deep breaths. As you’re breathing deeply, focus on what you’re feeling inside of you, in your genitals. You will notice that your intensity of pleasure has relaxed and moved away from your genitals. This will spread pleasure through your body. Then simply start again and keep repeating, the more you surf the edge, the more full bodied your pleasure. The first step is being aware of what you’re feeling inside of you. This will make a difference simply because you’re feeling in yourself and you’re choosing to feel more pleasure. As you increase your awareness of how your sexual energy moves so will your awareness in the difference between ejaculation and orgasm. Focusing on the difference and choosing to bring the ejaculation intensity forward then stopping and breathing will expand that intensity further into orgasmic pleasure. And, practice practice practice… This is the main difference between the expansion techniques of Tantra and the control techniques of Taoist .
