Orgasms, Orgasms and More Orgasms
As humans we’re capable of many different types of orgasms- 23 kinds in fact!
We often limit ourselves to the idea of just one- peak orgasms, therefore missing out on the many other possibilities that the orgasm offers. Sometimes thinking we’re not even having one when we actually are…
Orgasms come in many shapes and sizes and all of them are valuable- even the little half, almost, ones shouldn’t be dismissed. Why? Well, from little things big things grow!
Orgasms and the search for them (when not under pressure) can bring in some playful and beautiful moments of sexual intimacy too.
So what types of orgasms are there?
As mentioned the most common idea of orgasm is that of peak orgasm: the sudden discharge of accumulated sexual excitement, resulting in rhythmic muscular contractions in the pelvic region characterized by sexual pleasure, often associated with other 
involuntary actions, including muscular spasms in multiple areas of the body, general euphoric sensation and, frequently, body movements and vocalizations (this is the Oh God, I’m coming moment). In a man, orgasm is generally accompanied by ejaculation, or release of his semen. The period after this orgasm (known as the refractory period) is often a relaxing experience, attributed to the release of oxytocin, prolactin and endorphins.
Other types of orgasm:
Orgasms can be bone shaking and spine tingling; they can also be so subtle that we don’t even realise they’ve happened…even a pleasurable shiver is a kind of body orgasm. Orgasms are generally accompanied by pleasurable sensations of heat and/or tinglings (what we call orgasmic energy), tension, fullness and release but they can also be accompanied by others such as expansion, opening, bliss, freedom- where our ordinary minds switch off and we feel the freedom of being mindless- what is known as the ‘little death of the ego’. We generally feel a change in our physical state after orgasm, we feel relaxed, expanded, lighter, more open or somehow different.
- Genital focussed- where the sensations of heat, tingling etc are experienced only around the genitals, generally peak style.
- Full body orgasm- where the sensations are experienced in many or most areas of the body. Sensations can be more fluid.
- Ejaculatory- the orgasmic energy is accompanied by the pleasurable release of semen, or female ejaculate called Amrita.
- Non ejaculatory- orgasmic energy peaks without fluid release (for men too).
- Explosive- where the pleasure seems to explode out of your body.
- Implosive- where the pleasure expands through your body, can feel like pleasure or melting/opening sensations.
- Multiple Orgasms– several ongoing peaks and releases of orgasmic energy, generally without fluid release every time.
- Spot Orgasms- P spot for men (either external or internal); Clitoral, G, P, A, C, U and Cervix for women. Clitoral orgasms are usually limited, others can be multiple, particularly the P and G spots.
- PC Orgasm- yes, contracting your pelvic floor muscles and breathing fully can actually take you into an orgasm.
- Valley Orgasm- this is where it can seem like nothing is happening but if you allow yourself to drop into it (in those moments of stillness during lovemaking that we so hope you’re having) where surrender happens and you open into something else, hard to define, it can be filled with connection, love, peace, expansion and more. You know it’s happening as your state has changed, worth exploring.
- Solo Orgasm- the ones you have by yourself can be truly delicious if you take your time.
- Anal Orgasm- your anus has a large range of nerve endings that can be awakened to pleasure.
- Non genital orgasm- arousal and peak/release of orgasmic energy can be experienced anywhere in the body- not only nipples but given time and consistent tantric stroking virtually any area of the body can become orgasmic.
- Breathgasms- through breathing alone.
- Mindgasms- where your fantasy takes you all the way.
- Spontaneous Orgasm- can happen anywhere at anytime eg. during exercise, if you’re energy sensitive or just lucky.
- Chakra Orgasm- energy expansion and release in a chakra ie. the heart or third eye (can be visual).
- Transcending orgasm- where the orgasmic energy expands up your spine.
- Emotional Orgasm- the pleasure that can arise after a release of emotion in lovemaking.
- Soul Orgasm- may not be associated with physical pleasure but contains images or senses that relate to us personally eg. feeling reborn or having a glimpse of infinity. Afterwards you feel a profound shift in the state of your body.
- Spiritual Orgasms- a sense of being at one with everything.
- Firebreath Orgasm- this is one we teach at our workshops and is a combination of many of the above!
- Anorgasm- no orgasm, or at least orgasm as we traditionally think of it. This occurs in 1 in 3 women during sexual play and up to 2/3 of women during penetration. It is rare, (or rarely reported as a problem) in men.
How do we experience more orgasms?
The main skill in experiencing more varieties of orgasms is in understanding what is possible, having an open mind and being willing to hang around in lovemaking long enough to experience it. Men are generally more single genital orgasm focussed but this is by no means what they are limited to.
The next step is to explore:
Stroking new areas of your body with your full presence, for touch helps to awaken your sensations, and your presence helps you (and your lover) to experience them.
Playing with your breath as breathing is the driver of your pleasure, (especially as you get close to orgasm and as you go into it. Most people stop breathing here not knowing they’re depriving themselves of greater pleasure!).
Keeping your body relaxed rather than tense as energy flows through relaxed muscles!
Keeping your attention inside your body as this is where orgasms happen.
Make friends with your pelvic floor as its contractions are literally a sexual energy pump!
Try some different positions.
Using your imagination (for where the mind goes the energy follows)
Letting go of trying too hard to get there, tensing up and overriding your pleasure.
Make orgasm a pleasurable journey of exploration rather than merely a goal to achieve.
Men-
Ejaculation for the man has long been viewed as the natural completion of sex, his biological need to release sperm in order to procreate and the pleasure that came with it was automatic. So in this way man’s sexual pleasure has been covert, unlike a woman whose sexual pleasure is largely separate to her ability to procreate and she’s had to claim it for herself, he hasn’t yet had to, until now. So much more is possible for you!
reporting feeling selfish, even shameful if focussing on his own pleasure, so he emotionally disconnect from his partner and disappear in order to be able to feel pleasure rather than shame. Because of this he often derives more satisfaction in helping his lover come than in feeling his own pleasure. His few moments of ‘coming’, his greatest point of feeling pleasure feels frustratingly limited to him allowing boredom to set in. In reality he is capable of multiple orgasms and a choice in coming or not…
Despite his conditioning it is not selfish for a man to let go of striving for the end goal and take the time to slow down and feel more along the way in lovemaking, in fact it is vital. For when a man is more familiar with feeling his pleasure it means he is more present and more in his body, inviting more potency, allowing pleasure to arise rather than having to force it.
Both lovers benefit from the resonance in the matching energy vibrations of pleasure, where the pleasure in his body literally invites the pleasure in theirs to awaken, creating more pleasure for both.
themselves in denial. As men, denying our warrior makes our unhealthy shadow aspect even deeper and much harder to manage.
energy to be an “hysterical paroxysm” requiring some form of “treatment”, or that she wasn’t capable of sexual enjoyment, but to “bear these things” ie sex for the benefits of motherhood. Nowadays the modern woman is claiming her rights to “her” orgasms and finding new and creative ways of experiencing them. Yet awareness of a woman’s G-spot is a relatively recent phenomena, for many years it was thought to have been as real as a “UFO”. This very real Sacred spot provides yet more possibilities for women to further know, enjoy and accept their bodies, their sexuality and themselves.
clitoral orgasms only, some have a mixture of both vaginal and clitoral, with or without the lingam/vibe/dildo. For many other women, the G spot still remains an unknown experience. and generally takes a greater level of self awareness and even self acceptance in the woman for it to awaken in her. It is part of her emotional body, one of the major energy centres in her body and experiencing it can bring an emotional intensity that can be unexpected or even frightening. But with knowledge and practice a woman (by herself or with a trusted lover) will find awakening this centre can allow her to access new levels of satisfaction in her sexuality that go a long way to fulfilling the intense emotional longings and frustrations that she usually hopes her partner can fulfil for her. Knowing her body in this way can allow her to share with her partner from a place of wholeness rather than a craving for fulfilment.
Gspot requires. So when you feel arousal happening remember to relax, let your muscles go and deepen your breathing.
-The fear of ejaculation. This is the fluid that can be expelled from a woman’s prostate gland (yes, she has one in the erectile tissue around the urethra, which the Gspot forms part of) when the Gspot is aroused. Because little is known about female ejaculation it can be viewed as urine by the woman and/or her partner. But it actually has a different chemical composition, smell and taste from urine. It is believed to help lubricate the urethra from the acidity of urine, reducing infections and also sweetens the acidic environment of the yoni to enhance sperm survival. In tantric terms it is known as Amrita, the nectar of love and is thought to be a Gift from God, and is seen as a source of rejuvenation. Letting go of Amrita can be an exquisite bliss that is beyond words, leaving a woman and her partner renewed. But a woman can often hold back in fear of “wetting herself”. In fact it is very difficult for a woman to pee when highly aroused, just like it is difficult for a man to pee when he has an erection. Knowing this can help a woman to relax and let Amrita flow when she has the urge to “pee” that comes from stimulation of her Gspot. It can happen separately from orgasm, or with orgasm.
done with” you greatly reduce your levels of experienced orgasmic pleasure.
