What are your desires for your relationship this year?
What would you like more of? What would you like less of?
Now is a great time of the year to reflect on your relationship over the last 12 months.
What worked, what didn’t.
It’s also a great time to discover your relationship desires for the coming year.
What you’d like more of, what you’d like less of.
Most of us spend more time trying to survive, rather than thriving
We focus on doing what keeps us safe and familiar.
Rather than on what might ultimately serve us best.
We do this because the oldest parts of our brain are focussed on protecting ourselves, keeping us safe and out of pain.
The downside is that this lets our defensive, unconscious habits run our lives.
Habits that can cause us more pain in the long run.
Rather than supporting us to make choices from the newer, more conscious parts of our brain.
Choices that will lift us into something new, more rewarding and fulfilling.
In truth, this way of being is serving our fear, rather than our love and our empowerment.
It is serving our smallness, sense of unworthiness, rather than our worthiness.
It is not an easy thing to break out of living in survival. There are so many models of fear, paranoia, power mongering, mismanagement and hate reflected around us.
Yet survival IS just a mindset (once our basic necessities are taken care of)
We can choose to be like the rest of the world, feeling unsafe, mired in our defence mechanisms.
Yet when we choose love, we find worthiness, trust, empowerment, healthy choices and freedom.
We cannot serve both these masters at the same time.
So what are you going to choose?
What are you going to bring into your relationship in 2023?
Are you going to serve your fear based negative stories about your relationship?
Or are you going to create beautiful new ones?
Are you going to continue purely mind-based sex that leaves you unsatisfied, and even hating of your limited self?
Or are you going to breathe new life into it, creating exciting new desires and possibilities?
Possibilities that will serve you both in and out of the bedroom.
Are you going to let your defence mechanisms win the day, keeping you safe but separate and alone?
Or are you going to reach out to your loved one and foster intimacy that comes from the truth of your heart?
Are you going to focus on everything BUT your relationship, letting the outside world dictate to it?
Or are you going to give it a life of its own by creating space for it on a daily basis?
The biggest danger to any relationship is apathy
Another danger is fearing making the wrong move and doing nothing.
Yet another is waiting for our loved one to do it for us.
Or worse, expecting them to and resenting them when they don’t. Without owning our own inaction.
You don’t have to make the right moves
You just need to make A move.
Then you can keep learning and adjusting and creating as you go along.
You’ll be surprised how self-empowering and relationship thriving this can be.
And we’ll be here giving you tips, tools and inspirations along the way, so you don’t have to do it alone.
Don’t let fear, hate and apathy win in your relationship (and in your life).