In these days when life is so busy, and often challenging, it can be easy to put your relationship on the back burner.
Relationships are living things, a force of nature, and this means they are either growing or dying. They’re never standing still.
Even if they are moving at a pace too slow to notice, they are heading in one direction or another.
So how do you make sure your relationship is growing?
Well, you definitely don’t leave it on a windowsill and forget about it. You choose to respect and nourish it.
You choose not to let the world control your relationship, you put yourselves in charge instead. And you do it together.
We offer you these simple tips to put into your day and reap the rewards.
You can try one, or two, or a few at a time.
If you’re not in a relationship at the moment, you can do each of the following activities with yourself.
If your partner isn’t in the space to try these with you, do them with yourself without trying to involve your partner. Then when you’re feeling nurtured and well-loved offer them to your partner. Let your partner know why, and over time, notice the responses you get.
Growing Love Tips for Busy People:
Daily 30 Second hugs: Do you have 30 seconds to grow your relationship? Taking 30seconds to hug
allows you to connect at more than the just physical level. When we hug (and breathe deeply), it connects hearts and awakens pleasure.
Sit/stand directly in front of each other when you communicate: It means that your bodies, hearts and souls are able to communicate at the same time. You make deeper connections without even having to try.
Make eye contact: Our eyes truly are the window to our souls. Take the time to really look into your partner’s eyes for a moment or two each day. It’s amazing how we can let this simple form of connection disappear. And it’s amazing how quickly we can grow it.
Slow down together: One of the simplest ways to make a connection with someone is to slow down together. Pause. Take a breath. Give each other the gift of your presence. Let the world go to hell for a minute, or two. It will go where it’s going whether you drop out for a few minutes or not. No agendas, just pause and see what arises.
Share an appreciation: Appreciation is like balm for the soul and sharing with your partner something you appreciate about them daily can really train their unconscious mind to see you as a source of love and acceptance they will want to keep tuning in to. Keeping it simple and real is the trick.
Share something true about yourself: This person you’re in relationship with is the most important. Can you let them in to who you really are? Intimacy is all about in-to-me-see and letting your partner see your authentic self is the way to grow it.
Share an activity you both enjoy: It can be a s simple as a cup of tea, coffee or glass of wine.
Ask your partner what they most need in this moment: In this busy, stress filled time it is easy to get overwhelmed. Asking someone what they need and being genuinely interested in the answer can help reduce the overwhelm. You don’t have to provide a solution, you are allowing them to feel heard and giving an empathetic response.
Make a genital connection: Strange as it may seem, your genitals have an intelligence all of their own. They also have a storehouse of energy. Getting them together helps them and you connect. This is not about having sex, or orgasm. It’s simply about connecting your genitals together, relaxing, breathing and feeling your connection with partner through them.
Ask for their agreement: If you want to talk to your partner about something, don’t go barging in on them with your needs. Ask them if this is a good time for them to hear you. This shows your partner that you respect them as a unique individual with their own needs.
Let your partner know the benefits: If there is something that you want from your partner, don’t just tell them what you need/want. Let them know what benefit it will bring you. This gives them not only a positive sense of why they would do this, it also gives them a sense of being on your team. Being on the same team is more inspiring than being given an order that you don’t understand and feel obliged to meet.
Loves, Fears and Desires: Before you go into lovemaking give each of you the chance to share what you love about the sex you have. And what your fears might be around it. Everyone has fears about getting intimate and sexual, it’s normal. It’s much better to normalise them by speaking them, rather than having them go round and round in your head. Thirdly, share your desires in this moment. It doesn’t mean you have to fulfil them all. Again, it’s about being real and making a connection.
Taking action makes a difference
Don’t just think about, as thinking about it won’t create change. Doing it will.
Your relationship is (or can be) one of your most precious resources, make it something you cherish with these simple steps.